Change what you can and do not worry about what you can’t change. The thing about life is it is a challenge.
When we worry about what we cannot change- we wear ourselves out trying to change things that we have no control over.
Some things you can change:
- Your attitude and perspective.
- Your habits.
- Your priorities.
- How you react to what people do and say.
- Who you surround yourself with.
When you focus on the things you can change, you feel positive and empowered to make necessary changes.
Stephen Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, describes the “circle of influence” and the “circle of concern.” He stated, “Proactive people focus their efforts on the circle of influence. They work on things they can do something about.”
Some things you can’t change:
- What other people say about us.
- What other people think.
- Your race and family. (Celebrate who you are and embrace yourself and your family.)
- The weather.
- How other people act.
Focusing on things you cannot change is a waste of time. You will start to feel drained and negative energy if you continue to try to change things you can’t.
Stephen Covey stated “as long as we are working in the circle of concern we empower the things within it to control us.”
Years ago, I worked from the circle of concern for many years. I allowed the comments of people to dictate how I felt about myself.
I remember in middle school, my hair was cut really short. I was called mean names like “boy” by 2 girls that lived in my neighborhood. I hated and focused on those negative, untrue comments.
I had low self-esteem back then and was a shy introvert. I empowered these girls to control how I felt about myself- because I did not have the right mindset and focus.
The thing about life is that when you don’t know who you are, people will tell you and even try to attach labels to you.
Fast forward over 20 years later….. my hair was recently cut really short and I have been getting so many compliments.
I stopped focusing on the circle of concern and am focusing on the circle of influence. I embrace myself and who I am, and other people do, too.
I challenge you to focus on the circle of influence. Don’t let the negative opinions of other people control you.
I like the prayer used by Alcoholics Anonymous “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference!”
Change what you can.
Let’s connect! What can you change that will make a positive impact on your life? Leave a comment.
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